Supporting Extroverts During a Pandemic
Ever since Susan Cain wrote the bestselling book Quiet: The power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking it seems as if being an introvert has become in vogue.
While I don’t have research to back it up, anecdotally speaking, I have noticed while interviewing podcast guests, working with clients, or even at dinner parties (remember those?), people have become more open about identifying as an introvert. It’s almost as if they wear it with a badge of honor. A sense of pride. For so long they have felt uncomfortable being around extroverted people and now they are excited to share their introversion with the world. I get it. If I saw myself as an introvert and had to constantly become drained from extroverted activities, I too would be excited about the possibility of changing my ecosystem.
Let’s take a step back and define introversion and extraversion. There are many definitions but for our purposes let’s use the one’s below from this article:
Extroverts are drawn to people; they get energy from social gatherings and are fairly outgoing.
Introverts find it draining to be around lots of people. They prefer peace, solitude, and quiet time. They usually crave alone time in their free time.
According to the Meyers Briggs Personality Assessment Tool I am an extrovert. I understand why the assessment labeled me so; I am absolutely a people-person. However, I’ve always struggled with labels, especially when it comes to my personality. It’s why I identify as an ambivert even if others may see me as an extrovert. An ambivert exhibits qualities of introversion and extroversion and can step into each depending on the context, their mood, or other goals. I often go back and forth, while understanding those who crave internal, independent, alone time and those who are outgoing and prefer to talk things out while working with a team.
Yet, as we approach a year of adapting to a world of masks, quarantines, social distancing and isolation, I have wondered where the support has been for those who are extroverts. It seems like much of the world has empathized with introverts. Supported them. Helped create systems to empower them to thrive. Yet, here we are, living in a world that goes counter to everything an extrovert craves. And I am wondering why the introverts are not going out of their way to support those on the other end of the spectrum and where are the extroverts owning how hard this time is for them? How are we as a society supporting those who feel as uncomfortable being alone as those who feel uncomfortable in a social setting?
Here’s my challenge to you today. If you know someone who identifies as an extrovert, reach out to them. Talk to them. Schedule a group Zoom call or an outdoor hang. It may be difficult for you, but sometimes we need to sacrifice our own discomfort for the sake of those we love. And most importantly they’ll be grateful for your support. Here’s to a world that appreciates the lonely spaces and the packed environments equally, and a society that accepts those who need each. Hopefully, we will all have the option to intentionally choose our environments soon. I can’t wait.