Sharing and Shielding

Perhaps you are a leader. Maybe you are a parent. Regardless of where you are, we all have to figure out when to share and when to shield. Kids don’t need transparency on everything, and neither do employees. If you overshare everything without the other person in mind, that’s not vulnerability, it’s often just poor judgment. A big part of being a leader or someone of influence is figuring out when to share and when to shield.

Sharing is important. We often need to be vulnerable and explain our perspective. Those that hold everything too close to the chest will often miss out on one of the best parts of life: relationships. In order to connect with people, we often have to share; let people know where we are emotionally and where we stand on our values.

Yet, as mentioned above, shielding also can be an effective strategy. While it’s not as sexy as radical candor, transparency, or authenticity, the reality is that we often have to shield those we care about. If you decide to share EVERYTHING, whether it’s good or bad, you often are lacking the intention of thinking about the person who you are supposed to serve. Shielding is underrated. It’s needed. Leadership requires heavy shoulders and often impenetrable forcefields.

Like most concepts, the key is to know when. When do I shield and when do I share? For me, it’s simple. I just ask the question, “what is best for this person?”.