Success and Performance

A great performance is one of the best feelings in the world. However, it's a slippery slope to believe that great performance = success. Analyzing performance requires nuance. What was the goal of the performance? Was it to win, or was it to get better? Where are you in the journey? What’s the end game? As Bill Gates famously said, “success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose.” Even more, peak performance is often about oneself, whereas success is often about others. Let’s unpack that a bit more.
 
Over the past six months, many have kindly asked me, “how is the book doing?”. They are asking about the performance of the book. Is it selling? Have you become a NY Times bestselling author? If you’re curious about the answer, it’s simply ‘not yet’. However, I am deeming the success of the book by the impact it has on people, not its statistical and financial results. Every time I have someone tell me that they shifted their mind, I smile. I can feel it in my bones. My hair stands up. It’s hard to quantify, but that's what I try to focus on.
 
Early in my career I would constantly track how my sport clients were performing. The wins and losses impacted my mood. At one point, I was working with over 30 athletes and 4 teams. And let me tell you, there were a lot of losses. It wasn’t healthy to attach my success to their performance. For one, I wasn’t the one who was performing, they were. And even more importantly, if we attach our identity to our performance, then we are in for a roller coaster of a career. Too often we believe that what we do is who we are, but that’s just not the reality. Our identity is about how we treat people. It’s about how others see us. In some ways, it’s about reputation. But, I actually think it’s your character. Character is based on your actions, whereas reputation is in the eye of the beholder. So, for me, I often direct my attention to whether or not my character helps make others better. That’s success.
 
I am sure you are no different. Maybe it’s intoxicating for you to attach your self-worth to a promotion, sale, or trophy. But, all of those will come and go. Nobody goes through life without a bad performance. We are all susceptible. All of us must learn how to decouple our performance and our success. It’s imperative that we find a way to serve others and get clarity around the fool’s gold of a great performance. And what about that rare moment when success and performance do intersect? Heck, celebrate like hell. I’ll be cheering you on.