Who You Are and What You Do

Who you are is not based on what you do, but what you do does have an impact on who you are. Let me explain further.

Many of us confuse our job with our identity; I am a coach, teacher, salesperson, athlete, etc. It makes sense if you think about it. We spend more time wearing our “work hat” identity than any other identity in our lifetimes. Further, our society often places value in what we do even more so than who we are. Just go to a cocktail party and see how quickly someone asks you what you do for a living. What we do is often associated with who we are. And there are certainly benefits to that.

When we link our identity to what we do, it can help us perform. For example, James Clear, in his popular book Atomic Habits, pointed out that those who attach their identity to habits they aspire to create are more likely to stick to the habit. For example, if I say, “I am an exerciser,” I am more likely to continue exercising. But combining what we do with who we are is also a slippery slope.

When our identity is attached to work, we often are blind to the elements that truly matter: the ones that make up our character. Our character is often more precious than our accomplishments. The most successful person in your field may not be successful at all in other areas of life, and what’s more, two successful people in an industry might have completely conflicting identities.

Who we are is complex. Our gender, race, sexual orientation, class, geographical location, religion, and much more impact how we navigate the world. And of course, what we do plays a role in who we are, but it’s by no means our entire self. Let’s not confuse our occupation as our entire identity. Leverage it to create the desired habits and let go of it and try on the other elements of your identity when needed.